Raphael #25: I OWN YOUR PUNK ASS!!!

by Raphael the Contraction


Ahhh, I have Raphael have returned to write, in a triumphant homecoming not seen since Napoleans return from Egypt, of course that was a horrible defeat but he made it look good and I’m making it look fan fucking tastic! If you don’t know I have been banished to the netherworlds of Corporate America where if you are willing to sign your life and soul away you too can make it to a comfy middle management position where you will waste your time in life not realizing how little you are actually accomplishing. Comfy being the key word I attempted to sell immediately, so far there have been no prudent offers for my soul, but they have taken me up on making sure they are my life. 35 days and in that span one day off, it’s awesome though overtime is good, the boss buys lunch on Sundays and the soda machine is only 30 cents. (My soul may already be gone) You may think that is point less, well if you do think that, get the fuck out!! I don’t write this shit to entertain you, hahaha.

Life is not a box of chocolates but it’s definitely up there. Now you are all waiting for my words of Wisdom, well here they are, DON’T BE AN ASSHOLE!!! I have up till recently forgotten that people are the black hearted cesspool of the earth. They are insecure in themselves, jealous, sinful, scared, angry, frustrated, and judgemental to the point of disrespect. Damn, I once knew all that and what’s worse I actually forgot how to deal with them. Then I was driving home after a conversation with Socrates, and I found my goddamn CHI as it hit me like a pissed off Canadian ice skater, I remembered everything that I knew and the corner stone I built it on, I’M BETTERTHAN EVERYONE AND I’M COOLER THAN YOU, THAT MEANS I OWN YOUR PUNK ASS SO BACK THE FUCK OFF, why because they are trying to tear you down, you are never wrong if you are just thinking inside yourself. I used to know that people don’t earn respect by being nice, you earn it by beating them to the ground with the fact that they are secondary in this world and that you are not. You roll out a red carpet for people and they will piss on it because they can, you roll out a blue carpet and tell people it’s because every asshole has red and they will go with the blue because they don’t want to be the average asshole. Existence is to be made by the bold, and the meek just have to live there.

Life is a war, the moment I stopped looking at it like that was the moment I got screwed like a French whore on Easter Sunday. Well seeing as how I’ve insulted religious dogma I think that means it’s time to wrap it up. But before I leave always remember…