Crazy Grandpa FAQ

Here are some of the questions people ask me on a regular basis... If you have any questions feel free to email me.

>>> Update: July 5th 2000 <<< *New questions are at the bottom, please scroll down*

Q: Are the grandpa stories true?
A: Yes, all the stories on this site are 100% truth.

Q: Do you really hate grandpa?
A: I don't hate him but I don't really like him very much. I do not have any respect for him.

Q: In one of your stories you said grandpa wore a black glove on one hand but in the picture of him eating, both his hands are bare… why?
A: Well aren’t you the observant little devil. He only wears it when it's cold out. His hand feels numb after the stroke. There are a few pictures that you can see he is wearing the glove.

Q: Is it your father’s father or your mom’s father?
A: My father’s father.

Q: Does grandpa know about the web site?
A: No, he has no idea. He doesn’t know what a computer is either.

Q: Does your family and friends know about the web site?
A: My mom does she loves it. My dad doesn’t know. I think he would be really mad. My brother knows and my friends know... and you know... and knowing is half the battle.

Q: What is grandpa’s name?
A: Stanley. We call him pop or grandpa. You are free to call him anything you would like. I suggest “Spanky”.

Q: How old is grandpa?
A: 83

Q: In the picture with Gramps stalking in the background, which one is you and which one is Chelsea?
A: Chelsea is the one with the braids on the right, and I am the one on the left.

Q: Wow Chelsea is hot where can I see more pictures of her?!
A: Click here.

Q: Brandie and Chelsea are hot, can I have their email address?
A: Nope.

Q: Do you get a lot of hate mail?
A: Yes, that I do. Click here to read it.

The following questions were emailed to me by one person. The person had a lot of questions. I only changed them so they were spelled correctly. They are not frequently asked by any means, but oh well.

Q: Did you know your grandpa before he was senile?
A: Yes I did. I have known him all my life. He lived in the same city, a very short car ride away.

Q: He does seem to be slightly ill tempered and a bit racist. If you did know him before senility, did he have these qualities then?
A: Yes, he did. He has always been a mean old man.

Q: Many people have a complete change of personality when they become senile. Did you know that?
A: Yeah. Circumcision is when they cut the foreskin off a penis. Did you know that?

Q: If you did know your grandpa before he was senile, did you like him then, or have respect for him then?
A: No, no I did not.

Q: Is the reason you don’t like or respect your grandpa because of the ill tempered/racist thing or is it because he is senile?
A: I don’t like my grandpa because he is a mean old man. I don’t respect him because he has never done anything to earn my respect.

Q: Do you know any other senile people?
A: Yeah tons.

Q: if so, how do you feel about them?
A: I am sexually attracted to them.

Q: What if someone you cared about became senile, how would you feel about them?
A: If I liked them, I would feel bad. If I didn’t like them, then I would make another web site. Hah.

Q: He's your father's father, right? But your father doesn’t live in the house does he? What’s that about? (Unless your father is mike, is he? If so is this your stepdad? is that why you call him mike? ) How do you like your father?
A: Wow there is one mother of a question. Grandpa is my dad’s dad, yes. My dad does live in the house… if he didn’t then WHY would his father live with us?! I call my dad Mike, because that is his name. How do I like my father? He is okay.

Q: are you ever afraid of becoming senile?
A: No.

Q: did you really cry after reading the email which said you would have a good life? If so why did it make you cry?
A: Look up the word sarcasm, then try to use it 10 times throughout the day.

Q: Where in Canada is your grandpa from?
A: He isn't from Canada originally, he is from Poland.

Q: Where is grandpa located now?
A: Toronto Ontario Canada.

Q: Has he made no effort to learn English better?
A: He knows how to speak English, but he had a stroke, so he mixes German, Polish and English together.

I’m lazy, more faq will be put up at a later date. I will let you know.