Vomit God #26: It Was the Best of Times, it Was the Blurst of Times

VOMIT GOD SPEAKS


2001. A year that will be forever etched in the great stone tablets of history. A year that saw great leaders rise, and tall buildings fall. Yes, it was a magical year, but I have just one question: Where the hell is HAL? Where are all the space stations? From the very moment I first saw "2001: A Space Odyssey" when I was eight, I often looked forward to all the grandieur of the cosmos unfolding upon me. What do I get? An ordinary year. For god's sake, it could have been 1996 and no one would have noticed! Well, all science fiction stuffs aside, my second year as a writer for WOV was an eventful one. Here's VOMIT GOD: THE YEAR 2001 IN REVIEW!!!

1)RITZ CAMERA: The third week of 2001 saw me starting a new job at Ritz Camera. I knew nothing about cameras, and didn't know jack about photography. This was further complicated by the fact that in the span of this one year, I'm on my third manager. Yes, I joined the ranks of the sales associates, along with about 10 other people I know. I'm still there to this day.

2)FUGAZI: Quite a year for possibly my favorite band. In March, Dr. Cox and I used the last legs of his jeep to make it to horrible, horrible Phoenix Arizona to see them, and what a fucking good show it was! Of course, we were stranded a day in the middle of ButtfuckNowhere Arizona because his jeep broke down, but all things considered, I'd do it all again. Later on that year, Fugazi released "The Arguement", thus beginning a new chapter in their career. Violas, female backing vocalists, and the addition of a second drummer make it possibly their most complex album. Pick it up!

3)GOOD MOVIES: I was suprised that there were actually some good films that came out. First off, "A.I", the film adaptation of the Brian Aldriss short story, came out, but many saw it because it was Stanley Kubrick's last project. I liked it. "The Lord of The Rings" was a pretty good film, considering how much they condensed the story, And "The Royal Tennebaums" was what I would call the best film of the year, but that was until I saw "Mulholland Drive." David Lynch never ceases to amaze me. Expect an article on how much I love this man in the near future.

4)SEPTEMBER 11th: Thank you Osama! I got out of school early and I didn't have to go to work! On top of that, I had Chinese buffet and some staff writers and I got into a messy confrontation with some security fuckers at the mall. Quite a memorable day.

5)DEAD ROCK'N'ROLLERS: 2001 saw the passing of the great Joey Ramone. Indeed, the world feels a little emptier without him, and the traditional Christmas Ramones singalong had a hint of sadness. On the other hand, George Harrison kicked the bucket. I think he was in some band of some kind....Two down two to go!

6)THE WOV: Many changes were wrought upon the WOV. First of all, the site was subjected to a major overhaul. Then, the floodgates opened, all now we have new writers, such as Desservo, Hot Alicia, and L. Then, yours truly took on a writer of his own, by the name of Armand Glocro. Keep in mind that all of these changes had no effect on me, mainly because I know that no one can compare! HAHAHAHA

7)THE GHOSTBUSTING: The first time was just okay, because I was making jocks, sluts, and nazi marines happy, but the second time was fucking swell! I loved the look on people's faces when they saw our proton packs! Maybe I can hunt down the ghost of George Harrison to save the world from his inflated ego.

8)VOMIT GOD: Still WOV's most prolific writer. Rest assured that it was just a warmup.

Despite the lack of flying cars, 2001 was full of fun and fury, Hopefully, those terrorists will destroy the Space Needle in 2002. There's no excuse for bad designing.