Hot Alicia #4: The Plight of the Dumb Girl

I like to be happy. I choose not to dwell on things that upset me. It's not that I'm dumb. It's not that I don't realize there are terrible things going on in the world. I just try to keep things simple.

And I don't mean simple enough that I will get it. I don't mean simple as in I'm slow, I just mean, why complicate things that don't have to be that way? Vocephus knows what I mean about keeping things real and simple. Wanting to be able to take things at face value without all the bullshit drama. It is, unfortunately hard to come by these days. Maybe that is why it is all the more valuable.

But back to simplifying. I remember there was a period of time a while back where I was angry at a lot of things and a lot of people for not seeing things my way. How can I be expected to do something right if you are telling me to do it the wrong way? And things got complicated. And it sucks. So I stopped insisting on my way. Yeah, things got screwed up, but it saved me the headache, and someone realizing their way was wrong without me having to argue it with them - well, it just plain made me happy. I wouldn't tell someone the obvious right way, and just went with the flow. Frustration is such a NOT happy emotion. And I prefer to be happy.

I am not dumb, however. This is my chance to brag a bit about myself and my accomplishments. I graduated with a respectable 3.8 something GPA. I passed each AP Exam I took. I got a 1390 on my SAT's. That's in the 95th percentile nationally. But I get the distinct feeling that people see me as somewhat of a "dumb blonde." Really funny to me, I'm not even a blonde...

But all joking aside, I know that I can act out of it, we all have our off moments. And I think I even play the part to my benefit sometimes. It's great. When I was younger I drove a '91 Honda Civic that had been the victim of a large truck's brake failure; I didn't have a trunk lid and my rear lights were in desperate need of repair. I used to get pulled over at least once a month and played the dumb girl to my advantage. Each time the nice officer would give me a once over and with a twinkle of pity and or lust in his eye, would say, "Well, I'll just let you off with a warning this time, but next time, you will be getting a ticket. Get that fixed." That lasted from oh, May - until December when I left for college.

Now, acting this way also has another benefit. As soon as speak up for myself and intelligently disagree with someone, I'm a bitch. I don't care what any celebrity says, this is not a term of affection. It doesn't mean I'm empowered. It means I am mean and demanding. Being the dumb girl... well, I'll be dumb, but then at least no one thinks I'm a bitch. So which is worse? Well, it depends on the people around you. It depends on if you care what other people think. And it depends on the mood I'm in.

Now don't get me wrong. I can be smart and not opinionated. I can understand complicated concepts and not piss anyone off. Entirely possible and it does happen frequently. But there are some people who don't take it that way. I'm not going to cop out and say they are threatened by a strong woman. I don't know that that is it. Sometimes when people tell you that you are wrong, it hurts, you need to defend yourself. OK, but just because I don't agree and I told you so doesn't make me a bitch.

Anyway - back to being dumb. Pointless conversations can get you far in life. If you have mastered the art of small talk, you will be well off. And dumb people can be great at this. Being the dumb girl means I don't have to get into a discussion about military involvement and America's strike back. I don't have to defend my beliefs, and I don't have say anything about anything that I don't want to. But I can ask how you are, how your parents are doing and how work is treating you. Even if I don't really care, those simple questions can engage someone and make them feel included. And everyone being included makes people feel happy (ah, so that's where my opening ties in!) When others feel happy, I feel happy.

Simple enough? I think so. Overall, I am intelligent, but I do capitalize on the perks of being an airhead. And I think that makes me just a smidgen smarter than I already was. Now, I'm not saying I am subversive and calculating in relation to others. God forbid you start to be suspicious of my every move. That would mean I am thinking ahead and keeping track. Too much effort. Simplicity. Remember that. I will try to keep things happy. Easy is happy. Simple is happy. Bitch, not happy. Raging against establishments, not simple, not happy. Like I said, I am not blind to the wrongs and injustices in the world, but me worrying about ships carrying oil crashing and killing animals or a tuna net catching a dolphin, and if graffiti artists are depleting the o-zone layer... or if you think I'm dumb... worrying about it just doesn't make it go away or fix it. It will only give me wrinkles.

So, they say the pen is mightier than the sword, not that I am going to around swashbuckling anyone who won't listen to me, but... I hope that I have shed light on a less often heard from part of myself.

Still think I'm dumb? Tell me about it. MrsDufay@msn.com.


XOXO
Hot Alicia