KAISER #6: Why I Want To Be A Zombie

A Confession

I Kaiser, really want to be a Zombie.

And yes, I have my reasons.

For starters Zombies have nothing to loose, they are already dead, it can only get better. And being undead means you are at the bottom rung of life, so low you aren't even on the ladder, a ladder they can only climb.

Zombies also have one singular goal, and it's a vicitmless innocent crime, eating the brains of the living. Why you ask? It beats going for the kidneys.

Zombies also vary from person to person, some see them as shambling masses with little intelligence, some see them as a fast paced horde of people that just happen to be dead and haven't bothered to stop. Now, I am not here to give you lessons on what a zombie is, or how to be one, how they go about doing hwta they do or even why. Simply that an existance where you do nothing but strive for a singular goal without having to get caught up on anything else, don't have to worry about trivial social matters, or even politics. Nope, just keep pushing to achieve that goal that drives you. Takes great dedication, and to live that life (for sake of a better phrase) would be marvelous. Of course all I do now is go day to day doing the same thing I did the previous day, in retrospect it seems like my life is quite parrell to that of a Zombie's. Course I don't get the advantage of never dying and I can't legally eat brains. Ok so neither can Zombies, but go ahead and try and arrest him ;p

Hrmm, being a Zombie, sign Kaiser Up !